Love

           This will probably be the hardest thing I've ever written, because it's so hard to describe how I feel, especially when it's about someone I care about deeply.  (I actually started writing this a few days ago, but I keep having to come back and change and add things haha!) Words and pictures just aren't enough to really show how much I love them and care about them, but I'd like to try and show it anyway, the best way that I can!  With Thanksgiving right around the corner and the Holidays sneaking up on us so quickly, it really makes you start thinking about everyone you love.  I'd like to write this before the new year starts.  (I'm going to write another entry dedicated just to family, but I'm waiting on a few surprises before I do so!  ;) )  This entry is for Dray.  <3
                                             

           

         Dray and I were actually friends for about a year or so before we dated.  (We actually went to our senior homecoming and prom together, just not as each other's dates haha!)  When we did get together, we dated on and off for a while before we were officially in a relationship.  And now we've been together for two years.  :)  We have both always been the type of people that wanted to be in a long term relationship.  A lot of our morals, views, and priorities are very much the same, which makes it so easy for us to be together and stay together for so long.  I've never met a guy who was so easy to communicate with.  We talk about everything, and we can have discussions instead of fights when we have issues.  Like all couples, we still argue, but we are able to do it without yelling or lying and hiding things.  It's amazing to feel so secure in a relationship.  The beginning of our relationship was pretty complicated, and some things still are, but they are minor compared to the beginning. I feel like if we got through those bigger problems, we can get through anything.                                                                                           

 

We're opposites in some ways, but very much the same in others.  I think we have both rubbed off on each other in one way or another.  He has helped me see reality more clearly, and I have helped him see the fun in life!  We balance each other out with our differences.  Although he absolutely hated dancing and even just mentioning the word 'dance' before we met, he has danced with me countless times and he secretly loves it.  ;)           

                                

                                             
         He didn't consider himself an animal person or an animal lover in any way before he met me either...
                                     

                          

 

    And he would definitely say that he wasn't a cat person.  (but he totally loves cats!)  ;D                                               

    BUT in return, he has gotten me to do and enjoy some of the things he loves also!

Such as... video games!

                             

      ....and jokes!
                                  

             As you can probably tell, we both already loved dressing up, whether that be for Halloween, the Renaissance Festival, a photo shoot, or just for fun!
                              

    Three years at the annual Greenville Zombie Awakening 2011-2013
                                       

     Renaissance Festival and Halloween last year! 


                      We started out as friends and so much has changed in two years!

     

 

We now have a snake family together, Dray has become my second shooter for weddings and other photo sessions, we've grown and learned so much, and now we're about to start traveling the country.  We're taking our first steps towards our careers and our life together.  It's amazing how much we have both accomplished, both on our own, and with each other, in our lives and our relationship.  I didn't think I could find another person who shared my love of accomplishment, hatred of humanity, passion for snakes, joy of dressing up, the desire for commitment, love, and honesty, and so many more things!
                         

            

                     

                                                

                                      

                                                 

                                            

                                             

There is SO much more that I want to write and so many photos that I want to post, but I was hoping to try and keep this somewhat short and sweet, haha!

I love you, Dray!  <3

The Joy of Writing

        I think I might write two blogs tonight, because I'm really in the mood to write for some reason!  :)  And this first blog is going to be about just that; writing!  I know I mentioned a little in previous entries that I liked writing.  I used to write poems, but then I moved onto writing short stories.  Very short stories.  Some of them were only a paragraph to a page long haha!  I just loved being able to be another character, or even write in first person, but get to have wild adventures.  It's like day dreaming, but to the extreme!

      It takes something very interesting to hold my attention, so when I would write alone I would get bored easily, so my stories would sort of just end very abruptly.  That's when I found role playing.  A lot of people who I have talked to about this had no idea what it even was.  Just in case anyone reading doesn't know what it is, it's when two or more people have a character that interact with each other through writing.  For example, the first person would start out with a paragraph or so with their character doing something.  Then the next person would write about their character coming in and interacting with the other person's character, and so on.  In the end it would like like a book was being written by more than one author.  It's kind of like a game.  It's so much more fun than writing by yourself.  It really feels like your characters are real and interacting with someone else that's real.  You can be anything you want, even animals or fantasy characters like elves, orcs, etc.

     Warriors is what first got me into role playing.  I was between the ages of 10 and 14 or so when I started reading Warriors (by Erin Hunter) and I used to play Neopets all the time online at that time also.  One day when I was scrolling through the forums, I found a forum about Warriors.  I saw people role playing as characters based on the the characters in the books.  It was awesome!  Of course, at that age, we weren't very good yet, and YES we did role play as CATS.  I role played Warriors for several years, and I progressed in my writing.  I met two friends that I have kept and cherished for years, named Gigi and Leo.  (those are nicknames of course, and they knew me as Kitty!)  I still talk to them to this day.  But unfortunately we no longer role play.  Reality took over and our role playing days were over a few years ago.


                                                            

     I have tried to get back into it, but it's hard to start up again when you don't know anyone to role play with.  Most forums have a tight knit group of friends so it's hard to get a character accepted and make friends with other characters.  This may sound crazy, but it's like real life haha!  Minus the fact that you can't be a cat in real life, sadly.

      Recently I re-entered an old role play forum of mine, and it brought back so many memories.  It's a bittersweet feeling.  I miss writing, I miss role playing, and I miss the friendship I had with my characters and my role play buddies.  I hope to start again and create new bonds.  It was a very big and important part of my life, and even just writing in this blog has brought back some of the same feelings I get from writing.

Insulam - My old board

       After many years of role playing Warriors, wolves, and some other animal based role plays, I eventually got into role playing humans and humanoids, such as elves, shape-shifters, vampires, etc.  The role plays got a lot more advanced.  It wasn't just silly children playing around posting a sentence or two back and forth.  There were rules, such as, each post had to have at least 1,000 words or more to even qualify.  You may think that sounds ridiculous, but it challenged us, and we LOVED beating challenges.  It helped us become better writers.  We used bigger words, stronger meanings, and more in depth characters.  I embraced a side of myself that I didn't even know existed.  Sometimes when I look back at some of the things I have written, I surprise myself.

      Here's a link to an old character profile of mine: Character Profile






      Instead of talking more about role playing, why don't I show you an example of a short role play I done in the past?  :)   This is a personal role play between a friend and I that we had done through emails with our characters.  To clue you in a little bit, the male character is a Draxon, which is a human that is part fox and part dragon.  And the female, my character, is a shape shifter called a Solumorph.  Her body is made up of stem cells, so she can change into almost any animal form, as well as change her hair, skin, and eye color, etc. 




Rohan:  "Another beautiful summer day, filled with sunshine and blue skies, and Rohan is soaking it up, lazing in a tree that had grown itself in the middle of a wide green meadow surrounded by similar but much older still beings with one leg swinging over a large bough and a sheathed katana suspended from a branch in his reach.  Hanging from other branches are chimes, jangling in gentle melodical tunes as he places a pipe flute to his lips to play an accompanying song.  The air is filled with music and his soul is comforted, all negative energy seeming to float away on the very breeze that inspires the chimes in his tree.

He pauses and lowers the flute, half sitting up and stretching blue and black wings, the dragon appendages moving a twitching flutter and then folding comfortably again so he can snuggle back against the friendly bark of the tree.  Hands and instrument on his lap, he look across the open plain with a big blue gaze, searching for something though he doesn’t know what.  Day in and day out he waits for a ‘something’ that he’s not sure anymore if will even show up.

He swings his leg a little more vigorously as nervous energy grabs hold of him, the tip of his vulpine tail twitching.  The Droxan (Dragon X Fox) feels anxious all of a sudden, the chimes in his tree singing out frantically in a swift wind that had picked up, a mixture of metallic cries and reedy moans.  His tall pointed ears almost visibly perk as he glances about like a spooked stag who scented a hunter.  But as quickly as the threat had blown it, the clouds shift and the sun reappears one ray at a time.  A shiver runs up Rohan’s spine and he tries to settle back, trying to resume the tune on his flute.
~Rohan"


My character:  "A streak of white catapulted to the ground, as the vixen leapt from the low hanging branch of a tree.  Paws hit the ground softly, silently, claws digging into the earth as she ran.  Her paws carried her across the open meadow, tall green grass almost hiding her completely, as they towered over tiny body.  Long limbs stretched, stride after stride, they took her farther, the cool air hitting her face comfortingly.  The sun's rays showered onto her thin, fluffy pelt, soaking into her skin and warming her all over, as she emerged from the shadows of the apple trees.  Golden brown eyes sparkled as they focused on the land before her, as she continued to run aimlessly.  In one sudden movement, her path changed, picking up all four paws at once, she bounced high over the grass, turning left in mid-air, making a sharp turn when she landed.  Her breath was fast and even, as she picked up speed, running straight toward a tree in the middle of the meadow, much like the one she had just came from, but a bit larger.  She narrowed her eyes, judging the distance quickly, when she noticed something strange. 

Blinding lights caused her to squint her eyes, as tiny silver objects in the distance caught the sun's bright rays and glinted like fireflies dancing around the tree.  Slowing as she approached the tree, she studied the foreign objects.  Each one dangled from thin strings, tied around the branches.  Finally she came to a stop, just under one of the shiney objects.  Lifting her gaze to look at it, she tilted her head to the side in confusion.  In less than a second she shifted into human form, her ears picking up many sounds.  The tiny metal objects clinked together as the breeze pushed them through the air, swinging on the strings.  But there was another, more interesting sound.  It came from in the tree.  It was beautiful.  Smiling, she lifted her deep brown eyes toward the top of the tree.  Seeing nothing be leaves and branches, she jumped, hands taking hold of a branch, her slender fingers wrapping tightly around it.  She could feel the scratchy bark against her skin as she pulled the rest of her body up.  When her bare feet touched the branch, she could now see where the source of the lovely noise had come from.  A man with very interesting features lay, sprawled across a branch with a flute held to his lips.  Her grin widened.

"It's sounds beautiful."  She spoke, her voice was soft, with a sort of tune to it, her british accent still strong.  Long, thin, straight black hair strung across her face, over her shoulders and down her back, stopping in a point just above her hips.  The sun seemed to sparkle against her pale, white skin, that, at the moment remained uncloathed, with her chest and ribs covered mostly with her hair.  She was short with a very tiny frame.  Thin arms and legs balanced her as she crouched on the limb, fingernails as sharp as claws digging through the bark."


 Rohan:  "Rohan was not immediately aware of the female’s presence, despite her climbing up into his tree, for concentration his puts into the music and the notes that fill his sensitive ears, working with his lack of attentiveness to hamper his perceptive surroundings.  He is taking a breath to exhale into the flute, leaving only a moment’s time of quiet in his hearing, when the girl speaks.  His eyes snap open and he nearly falls out of the tree in surprise, his body jumping and upsetting the precarious balance he had been keeping.  He wobbles for a moment, one wing flapping fiercly to create wind that would hold him up and the opposite hand grasping the tree’s trunk, claws digging desperately into the bark.

Once again settled, warily releasing his hold on his perch and clutching his instrument to his chest like a treasure he almost dropped, he looks down at his visitor with a wide-eyed expression, shock still evident on his features.  “Uh...thank you?”  And then he notices the bareness of her figure, something inside him seizing up with embarrassment as his face lights up like a beet, the blood rising to his cheeks as he looks away.  “Th-the flute does all the work, y-ya know?  I j-just...I’m just full of hot air.”  He gulps nervously.

“You always run around like...like that?”  He half points at her, but draws his hand back before fully gesturing, because pointing is rude.  And he doesn’t want her to think of him as rude.  He doesn’t mean to be, but women make him nervous to begin with and now there is one right here.  And to add to his discomfort she’s...well, you already know!  Does he have to explain it?  The more he thinks about it, the redder his face gets and now the blush has spred to his ears which droop a little bit with embarrassment.
~Rohan"



My Character:  "Essence laughed at his reaction.  She was very comfortable with her body, but she did usually carry a bit of cloth with her to change into after shifting.  This cloth was tied up her arms and legs in strips, that criss crossed and overlapped here and there, almost like mummification.  "Oh.  Yes, well, no not always."  She answered, jesturing toward the cloth on her around her hand and wrist, winding up her arm and over her elbow.  Begining to untie it, she carried on the conversation about the flute.  "But you have to have skill and talent to play as wonderfully as you do."  She complimented him, as she leapt down from the branch, and began wrapping the cloth under her hips. 

She stiffled another laugh as she remembered the redness, of the skin on his face.  Was it really that surprising?  Okay.  Yes, it was.  But she hadn't meant to stir up any problems.  She now untied the cloth from her other arm and overlapped it serveral times across her chest, leaving her belly and shoulders still bare.  Looking back up, into the tree, she called up to him.  "You can come down now."  A grin spread across her face, "It's safe."  Before allowing him to speak again, or waiting for him to come down, she went on again.  "I love the charms."  Reaching her slender fingers out, she stroked one of the silver objects hanging from a branch.  "Very lovely.  Why are you here?  In a tree, playing music?"  She asked nosily, not caring if she entered his personal life or not.

So many things were interesting to her, and when she wanted to know something, she didn't hesitate to ask. "



Rohan:  "With Essence more or less clothed, at least covered up, Rohan’s confidence level goes up dramatically as he is brought back to his comfort zone (where females don’t walk around naked in front of him...).  So when the coast is clear he drops from the high branch he had been perched on like some big odd bird to a lower one.  He swings backwards from that one, hanging upside down in front of Essence, his long golden blonde  hair hanging straight down and his wing wrapping around his body, from behind which he peeks at her with large and curious blue eyes.  They smile for him, without the rest of his face ever having to be seen.

And he lets her talk and ask her questions, waiting until he is very sure that she is done speaking.  He doesn’t mind at all, completely at ease with the turn their conversation has taken.  He chuckles quietly, closing his eyes tightly as his hidden mouth gives a jovial smile and they open again to continue sparking warmth.  “I enjoy music,” he states simply, though he knows that it doesn’t actually answer her questions.  He sighs and shrugs, rolling his eyes upward (or in his case, since he’s upside-down, downward) in a thoughtful way as if it actually helps the process.

“Just hanging around and staying out of trouble.  Keeping out of everybody’s way.”  He says it as if her were a nuisance, like a cat that gets under the feet of the parent in a household that hates felines.  But there is something in his voice that says that what he says in not all truth, not exactly lying but that he is holding back.  Can Essence blame him?  They only met, he doesn’t even know her name yet.  Rohan would very much like someone to confide in, but he isn’t so lucky as to be able to afford such a luxery.
~Rohan"



My character:  "She watched, as he hung upside down, from the branch in front of her.  Like a bat, his large, blue wings folded around his body, hiding half his face.  Giggling, she noticed his eyes light up.  She smiled at the simplicity in his answer, happy to know that he hadn't minded her asking so many questions.  "Staying out of trouble?"  She gave him a michevious grin.  Getting into trouble was something she happened to be very good at.  She often considered it 'fun'."



Rohan:  "It makes him happy when he can make someone laugh, it makes him smile uncontrollably and with Essence there is no exception.  He pulls his wings away from his face, uncurling them slowly (carefully so as not to bowl his company over with them) and he sits up on the branch and slips over the other side.  He lands deftly, solidly on both feet and spins around, wings folding on his back neatly.  His gold-hued tail wraps around his waist for the lack of somewhere to go.

“Uhm, yeah, trouble.”  Uncertainty flickers in his tones this time and for a second he seems to drift away from the here and now.  And as suddenly as his mind had gone away he snaps back.  But this time the crazy-happy smile is gone, replaced by serious concern as his ears perk up and he turns all his attention to something...what was that?

An arrow whizzes by Roe’s head, slamming into the trunk of the tree and evoking a saddened expression on the droxan’s face as he reaches out to touch the wound.  The tree hadn’t done anything wrong...  But he has no time to mourn the flora’s hurt as he grabs Essence, pulling her against him as a matching pointed shaft sings through the spot where she was just standing.  His heart begins to slam in his chest, his blue eyes taking on an animalistic fear as he looks in the direction the attack is coming from.  He had been discovered; it had taken a bit longer than he had thought, but hiding is over and now it’s time to run again.

A silent curse, much unlike him, escapes his lips as takes a step back from his friend.  Pain courses through him as he issues the unspoken command to his body, and he has to muffle a cry with his hands, eyes clenched tight shut.  He can feel his very structure snapping, his insides and everything he is reforming in an agonizing process to give him new shape, a golden-furred dragon with a blue-green mane.  A snarl rips from his throat and he steps forward and sweeps Essence up against his chest with clawed paws, stepping back on his two hinds.

“Don’t be frightened,” he whispers as softly as he can in a voice harsher than his own.  He shields his new friend the best he can with his own bulk as he beats his wings, the air stirring violently around them and throwing back missiles.  With a bound he makes it into the air, climbing high to seek the shelter of the clouds above.  The added weight is a little strange, but he doesn’t feel himself in any danger of strain; she does not add much burden but enough so that even through the beast’s mind he does not forget her.  Rohan cradles the small form against his warmth, trying to shield her from the cold of the higher altitude, leery of his cumbersome claws that would hurt her."



My Character:  "Essence smiled back at him, as she watched his navy wings spread when he pulled himself up and over the branch, to slide off the other side and land on the ground in front of her.  Hearing his reply, she gave him a playful look, tilting her head to the side like a confused puppy.  "Why run from trouble?"  Just as she had said this, she too was distracted by the sound.  Seeing in his eyes and quickly changing facial expressions, she knew that he had heard it as well.  Something else was there, he knew what was happening, or what was about to happen.  Suddenly an arrow split through the air, flying past the male's head, causing a few locks of his golden blonde hair to blow behind him.  It slammed into the tree, scarring the trunk.

Before she could say or do anything, her new friend ran foward, cupping her in his muscular arms, and taking off with amazing speed.  In the rush, she barely noticed the arrow that cut through the air just where his head had been.  She gasped, but wasn't sure if she had actually made a sound.  The rush of air around her was loud, and filled with panic.  She could literally feel the male's heart breating rapidly through his chest.  When her feet touched the ground again, she felt a bit relieved, but she knew that danger was still there.  Shifting her eyes over the land, she fantically looked for the source of the arrows.  Without luck, she turned back to the male, to see him change his shape.  His new form was amazing, but she didn't have enough time to gaze at him in awe.  For she had been swept up again.  This time, she wrapped her slender, white arms around him tightly.

His fur was soft, comforting even.  She heard him speak, telling her not to be frightened.  A smile returned on her still shocked and confused face.  "I'm not."  She whispered, unsure if he had heard her or not.  For some reason, he made her feel safe.  The way he carried her with ease, she knew he wouldn't drop her, he was astonishingly strong.  Ice cold air whipped over her half-bare body, as he flew into the air, his large bat-like wings beating feircly.  She felt herself being pulled closer to his chest, feeling his warmth wash over her.  Then something occured to her...  Why was he being chased?  Who was chasing him?  How could she be sure he wasn't the bad guy?  Right now, there was nothing she could do about it, and she was pretty sure he wouldn't have saved her if he was evil.  Still, she didn't know this man, having just met him only a few moments ago..."



Rohan:  "The thought had occurred to him, only briefly and very fleeting, that he would have created question in her mind, maybe suspicions even; and could he tactfully explain his situation if she were to inquire an explanation?  Being swept off your feet (literally) and into the sky while arrows are singing through the air with you as a target is not something you would think lightly of (normally, whereas he has become somewhat accustomed to it).  What is he supposed to tell her, now?  However, he has no time to linger on these worrisome thoughts, eyes darting through the sky as he hits sky cover, judging where he should escape to and always keeping himself aware of the girl in his arms.

His fox-like (kind of floppy) ears darts forward as a faint call makes it up to their height.  A large projectile of some sort, shot from a catapault most likely) whizzes by a hairsbreath from their side, startling Rohan and disrupting the motion of his wings.  He cries out (more of a panicked roar) as his elevation drops below the cover of clouds, his hold on her shifting gently as if unconsciously assuring himself he had not dropped her, before he can regain a pattern that would hold his weight in the air.  Too late...

‘Thwunk!’  A heavy arrow pierces his toughened hide into the side of his neck, near his shoulder and another rips a hole through his right wing.  His wings flutter rapidly, his body writhing in mid-air, a long, soft groan rolling forth from his throat as he gains control of his movements once again.  Climber higher is out the question, but he strikes out away from the deadly missiles, heading for the trees.  As they break through the upper canopy he lowers his head over Essence to protect her frailer body, slowing down as he goes until he drops into the crook of a tree.

He lands heavily in the security of the tall oak, bracing the upper half of his body up with one strong arm while holding his precious cargo in the other.  “You...al-al...right?” he growls out, looking at her with a mixture of pain and concern in large blue eyes.  His brow twitches into what could be considered a frown (for a dragon), not wanting to deposit her in the branch next to him until he is sure that she is fine.  So he holds up his body, despite the weariness calling him to slump and relax, the leg trembling slightly with the exertion but remaining steady.

Blood coats his neck and down over his shoulder, staining the golden fur crimson and dripping from the clumped fur onto the greenery of the foliage around them.  His teeth clench between words, breath rasping from pain and ears swivelled backwards with his discontentment.  His pierced wing, meanwhile, hangs lower than the other.  With ever twitch it splatters scarlet upon the tree, but thankfully the damage to it is minor."




My Character:  "A high-pitched squeal passed her lips as another arrow split through the sky, this time it didn't miss its target.  It hit the side of his lower neck, just above his shoulder.  Before she had time to think another one sliced through one his wings.  She wrapped her arms around him tighter, trying hard not to sink her claws through his skin.  Even though his hide was extremely thick, she didn't doubt for a second that her claws wouldn't easily peirce through it.  So, she refrained from doing so, though it was tough not to.

Relief surged through her, making her fill a bit light headed, when they came to a stop, landing on the branch of a tree.  She sighed, feeling herself relax.  She didn't know whether to stay in his arms, or get down.  Looking up, she could see the answer in his eyes.  He needed to relax himself.  She eased the grip within his thick golden fur, and allowed herself to slowly slide out of his arms and down his chest, landing gracefully on the branch just beside him.  "You alright?"  She asked, concern for the strange creature, filling her eyes.  It was now, that she had realized how much she didn't know this stranger.  In fact...  They still had yet to introduce themselves.  She didn't even have the pleasure of knowing his name."



Rohan:  "Rohan almost panics when he notices her sliding out of his arms, afraid that he might be dropping her, until he realizes her intent to slip onto the branch near him.  He has to be honest with himself, it is a relief, and he can allow himself to collapse in the cradle of the sturdy branches, trying to relax the tension built like iron into his muscles.  All the while he is aware of the throbbing in his neck and that he is going to have to risk bleeding to an excess when he pulls it out so he can reverse his shape and fix some of the damage done.  His eyes half close as he tries to soothe the rushing in his head, needing to be calm and collected when he attempts his transformation, but opens one fully to give attention to Essence when she speaks.

Again, his lips curve into a dragon’s smile, a pure white fang exposed harmlessly through the grin and he makes a subtle motion that could be interpreted as a nod.  “I’ll be fine,” he breathes out as he shifts and reaches a tentative claw up towards his neck, pawing the shaft and trying to get an idea of how it’s stuck in so the removing of it might be easier.  “...as soon as I can turn back.”  If he turns back, because of the way his body has to reshape inside, the wound could disappear completely.  Or it will at least diminish to a less drastic size.  It’ll be easier said than done, the muscles in his face twitching in a pained grimace as he curls his claws around the slim arrow body.

He’d really hate to ask her to help him with this little problem of his, so he grips it tighter, screws his eyes tight shut and grits his fangs together, and yanks.  He has to do it twice, one to loosen it and pull it part of the way out of his flesh and the second time to draw it the rest of the way out.  He lets out a groaning, grumbling sigh, rolling his eyes upward as his waits for the new pain to subside a little, tossing the blood-coated shaft out and away from them.  As he expected, a new amount of bloodflow pours from the wound and he feels a sense of urgency take over him.

“Excuse me,” he mutters and lifts himself onto his feet, stepping backwards carefully and half standing on his hinds to spin around so that he can jump from the tree.  The landing doesn’t go quite the way he had planned it, hitting the ground on all four feet but his fores giving out beneath his weight.  He just remains where he is, then, concentrating on initiating the second transformation which takes a couple minutes.  Soon he can put a fingered, human hand up to his neck, feeling the slickness of blood still coating furless skin, but the dangerous hole now gone.

He sits up and flops back between two of the tree’s roots, hugging his own shoulders and huddling over against his knees while his body is racked with shivers as if he were stuck out in a blizzard.  His teeth chatter noisily and when he looks up in the tree to look for Essence, calling up to her, he stutters over his words as if he had not talked for years.  “Y-you o-o-okay up there?  N-nee-d me to help you do-d-down?”
~Rohan"




My Character:  "Essence didn't know what to say.  She just watched him in confusion, as he laid back onto the branch.  After she had spoken, and he answered her question, she nodded, but still wasn't quite sure if he was actually alright.  Her eyes shifted over him as he began to jerk the arrow from his neck.  She grimaced, as if she could feel his pain.  After he pulled it out, he excused himself and left the tree.  Her eyes followed him through the branches and watched him as he shifted.  The wound on his neck had disappeared, but blood still dripped along his skin.

She watched in concern as he fell back against the trunk of the tree, and say shivering.  Frowning as he spoke, stuttering over every word, she really started to not believe that he was okay.  "Yeah, no, I'm fine."  She answered his question after a moment's pause, then questioned again, "...but are you sure you are?"  Sliding off the tree branch, and landing on her bare feet below, she crouched onto her hands and knees and crawled through the soft grass to sit beside him.  She placed her slender fingers on his neck, sliding them slowly down to his shoulder.  Keeping her eyes on his, she spoke again.  "Oh, I'm Essence by the way."  She grinned half heartedly, concern still clouding her eyes."



Rohan:  "Rohan smiles slightly, wearily, at her when she crawls over to sit beside him, but he didn’t expect her to reach out and touch him.  If he had, he might not have jumped so much.  But he does, eyes snapping open and instinctively flinching away, though the tree gets in the way and he can’t get away from her hand.  His large aqua eyes watch her, staring into hers for several long moments as if discerning her motives, his whole body stiff until he finds it possible to slowly relax.  His cheeks flush bright red with embarrassment for having cringed at such an innocent thing and he mutters something incoherent that might just be an apology.

“My name is Rohan...Rohan Royama.  But my friends call me Roe.”  He reaches up to place his hand over hers, his fingers are ice cold and her hands feel feverish to him in comparison.  Picking her hand up and bringing to his lips to kiss her knuckles gentlemanly, then running his thumb overtop the spot.  “I’m sorry I caused you so much trouble.  I don’t mean to be a pain.”  He frowns and tries not to look down, that would just make him seem more lame.  (Come on...he just acted like a complete coward and all she did was reach out and touch him.)"






           Okay, so if you actually read all of that haha!; That is what a shorter simple role play looks like!  Keep in mind that I wrote that 5 years ago when I was 15 years old!  So it's not too impressive, but it gives an idea of what I used to do and what role playing is.  That's a short one too, because most of our role plays were much much longer than that.  Each individual post from a character was at least a page or two long, if not more.  I've role played so many different things that it can get hard to keep up with and remember, so I try to stick to two main characters whose personalities and appearances somewhat look the same, but a few things differ depending on the type of role play it is.  I have a 'good' and a 'bad' character.  I have played many different characters and roles, but I usually stick to those two.  :)  Although, the names do change sometimes.  If you read Adelaide's biography in the link above, then you'll see what I'm talking about.  Essence is based off of her, they're basically the exact same person, just with different names.


          If you didn't think I was completely crazy before, then you probably do now!  XD  But I am not ashamed to admit how much I love writing and role playing, and how much I am desperately hoping to get back into it again!   A friend of mine recently discussed it with me, and when I say recent, I mean just about an hour or so ago and it helped prompt me to write this entry.  XD  So hopefully we'll be able to start it back up!  Although I haven't role played with her before, I definitely look forward to it.  :)



         SO, I am sorry to bombard you with this novel of a blog post, BUT it's been fun reminiscing!   :)  

          

Keys in the Moonpie Box!

(by the way, this picture has nothing to do with this blog, it's just something pretty to look at while you're here!  ^-^ Carry on!)


                  So, I already mentioned in my first blog how forgetful I can be, so this entry is going to elaborate on that some!  There will be some of you who completely understand what I'm talking about, and some of you that will probably think I'm completely crazy.  XD  BUT! I hope this will shed some light on a few things. And hopefully help you understand me a little more.

              I'm not sure really if ADHD and forgetfulness is genetic or not, but several people in my family are this way, and we have learned to live with it and laugh about it.  I have had a few people get angry with me though, for forgetting to send photos, or message them back on facebook or text back, etc.  I want to say right now, that I apologize to anyone who I may have done any of these things to.  I promise you it's not on purpose!  I always try to be quick to reply to any messages especially involving my work.  I do have a lot of places to check everyday, two facebook accounts (one public and one personal) along with my photography page which also gets messages, my emails, my website, two tumblrs, modelmayhem, 500px, flickr, deviantart, instagram, my phone, calls, texts, etc.  So sometimes I do forget to check every single one and reply to everyone and I'm truly sorry about that!  Not to mention,the dumb glitches where notifications never come through and texts are lost in cyberspace somewhere. I wish there was an easy way to consolidate everything, but in order to get my work out there I try to put it everywhere I possibly can!
                              
                                 

(This is just a tiny glimpse of what my phone looks like on any given day!  Texts, facebook notifications, instagram notifications, emails, etc.  Also note that my phone is dying; it is always dying haha!)

           I have always been a very easily distracted person.  It's always been hard for me to focus, unless I get into that hyper-focus mode, which makes it very hard for me to multitask.  Please don't ever think I am ignoring you, because there are a number of reasons why I may not reply.  I leave my facebook open all the time, and since my phone has me logged in as well it makes me look like I'm on facebook 24/7 haha!  A lot of times when I'm home, I'm doing other things and will get on my computer every now and then to check something or reply to a comment, etc.  And when I am on my computer, most of the time I am going back and forth between facebook and editing, always trying my best to keep up with everything.  BUT if I see a cute kitty picture or something, I will admit that I do get distracted!  When I watch one video, it leads to another and another and another and another!  Then I realize that an hour has went by, then all of a sudden the sun is coming up and birds are singing and I jump in bed!  XD

            I am also a HUGE perfectionist. I put a lot of time and effort into my work and I don't settle until the photo is exactly how I want it.  Because of that, it sometimes takes me a very long time to edit certain photos. When someone pays me for a session, I try to edit as many as I can and as fast as I can.  I always want you to be happy with the photos and get your money's worth. Weddings, they definitely take longer, especially when I have multiple weddings that month and other photo shoots in between, along with all of my other every day responsibilities and life.  I've noticed that a lot of people seem to forget that other people have separate lives from their work whenever they are waiting on something they want, like photos. When I do my creative experimental sessions ( AKA, my art and my favorites!) I take even longer on them because I have to put them off lots of times to concentrate on the paying clients and other important things in my life. I normally edit a few right away though and lots of the time I will edit more later and you will receive them out of the blue as a happy surprise. :)  I love photography and I love staying busy but lots of times I do overwhelm myself and I find myself wanting to just get away from it all.   I feel like I rarely ever get a day to myself.  I am noticing more and more that I sometimes really need that.  

           As for why I'm so forgetful, I don't really know why, but here's the best way I can explain it:  My mind is always going, and there is so much going on in there that I feel like I just can not possibly focus...  I can't even focus on my own thoughts, because they get distracted onto things that don't even make sense after a while!  XD  Sometimes I have an entire conversation in my head that I think I said out loud, and I'll actually go to say something out loud to someone and they will look at me like I'm insane because it won't make any sense to them.  It will have nothing to do with the conversation we were previously having, but in my head it somewhat makes sense because one thought went off of another and then another until I got to this conclusion which suddenly seemed more interesting, then I forget what brought it on in the first place!  I constantly forget where I'm going, what I'm looking for, what I'm going to say, what I'm doing, etc. because my thought process is so crazy!  If people could hear my thoughts, people would understand, but still be confused I think.  XD

          I do the same thing with messaging, where I have a conversation in my head and think that I actually had that conversation with that person or replied to a message, but I didn't.  Days later I will be thinking, 'Why haven't they messaged me back?' and when I look, I was the one that didn't message back!  And I do this with everyone; my mom, my boyfriend, friends, random people.  Luckily I don't do it constantly, but it has happened a lot more than once.  I actually like for people to remind me about things, and send me multiple messages if I don't reply.  Don't be afraid to bug me, because I need reminding haha!

          I think technology has kind of helped make things like this harder.  Because if all of these inquiries were happening in person, I would be right there replying face to face, instead of not getting a notification, or a message not showing up, or miscommunications happening because emotion isn't shown through text, etc.  I have been keeping myself more organized when it comes to my work though. I always set reminders and alarms and ask people to remind me about things, and do just about everything that I can so that I can remember everything.  

          If you notice, in my writing, things probably seem to be jumbled up also, because my mind jumps from topic to topic and I'm trying to make sure I can get everything in, but I'll go off on a tangent in another direction than what I was previously planning--like right now for example!  XD

          I am also SO bad at losing things!  All kinds of things!  My keys or purse, my phone case, a hair appliance, clothing, etc.  My mom has always said every time we lose something that we finally find it in the strangest places.  So because of that, any time we lose something, we all yell, "It's probably behind the toilet!"  XD  And we really have left things behind the toilet, which you would probably think is the strangest place to lose something, but there are stranger places.  The funniest story of something lost that we have is when my nana lost her car keys!  We searched and searched for hours, my mom, my sister, my aunt, my cousin, my nana, and I were all trying to hunt them down!  We checked the obvious places like her purse, tables, car, night stand, etc.  but they were absolutely no where to be found!  (When I lose something I TEAR the house apart until I find it!)  We always try to retrace our steps to find and remember things.  So that's what we did in this case.  We asked my nana what she had done that day.  So she said, "Well... I woke up, and I got a moonpie...."  So we grabbed the moonpie box and sure enough, her keys were there, IN THE MOONPIE BOX!  We still die laughing about that story to this day! I do things like this, ALL the time.  I have left my phone in a shoe in my closet floor, in clothes in the dryer, under my bed, behind the toilet, in the shower, just all the weirdest places possible.  XD

         So like I said, we all have fun with it and laugh about it!  It's not a crisis by any means.  But, please if you ever are wondering why you haven't heard back from me,(business or pleasure!) don't hesitate to contact me. I won't mind at all. :)

      (I've been planning this blog entry for weeks, but I'm finally writing it now.  I did get a little distracted by this awesome video of a raccoon playing with water!  Look how cute! :D)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=njptXwFU2fs

A blog about a blog

                     I went through some old blogs that I wrote back in 2007 on myspace and I wanted to share them here!  One blog in particular really tells a lot about who I am as a person and it shows how much hasn't changed about me also.  I have always been the type of person who wasn't afraid of being different, of being myself, and not following the crowd and conforming to what the majority of people are doing.

                First, here is the very first blog I ever wrote!
             

I just thought this was funny and showed a little of my personality from then and now haha!  I've always loved cats and I remember when making "Ascii Art' wasn't even popular on social networking sites and even through texts or anything else.  I just thought these were so cute and I still do!  haha!

              And here is my second blog entry:
            

                                   

                     I feel like this blog really still explains a lot of things about me.  Good things that haven't changed, and I am very happy that they have stayed the same.  Looking back and seeing how other things in the world have changed now it makes me laugh to see how drastically different certain things have become.  For example; HIPSTERS!  I remember when kids at school would make fun of me for not wearing name brand clothing from the mall, and how I was weird and gross and different for wearing clothes I got at a thrift shop or vintage clothes that I loved!  And now it's  everywhere because it has become the latest fad!  It's just crazy!  I have had people tell me that they thought I was a hipster because I liked wearing vintage dresses and shopping at thrift shops.  No.  My mom shopped at thrift shops when she grew up and I have been all throughout my childhood.  And I am happy to admit that, even before it was the 'cool' thing to do!

                     So when I wrote this blog I had just turned 15 years old.  This was about 6 years ago in 2007.  I am very happy to admit that I still agree with the things written in this blog.  I love being me, and I am happy with who I am even if I am not like everyone else.  I will never become like everyone else just to fit in or look cool.  I am often left out and have no real friends because of this.  But I am okay with that, because I don't want to be friends with people who treat me badly since I don't act the way they do or because they think I'm not as good as them.  And I am tired of people telling me that I am 'copying' them or their work.  You can see clearly here that all of these things have been true for years before most of you even knew me or met me.

                    Those of you who have stuck around long enough to really see who I am and you still love me and support me, thank you!